10 out of 10 for style,
but minus 7,000,000 for good thinking.
led zeppelin fan blogs be like ‘jimmy-page-squeezed-my-lemon-so-the-juice-ran-down-over-the-hills-and-confused’
Anonymous said: the world would be very different if we had one big tooth instead of a bunch of teeth
It would also be highly impractical. Animals on this planet developed teeth for various reasons. We have three different types of teeth. I am by no means a qualified dentist, but I will nevertheless attempt to explain teeth to you. If I wish to make this blog into a blueprint for a future religious movement I can’t be afraid to speak confidently on subjects I don’t know anything about.
At the back of our jaws we have the nut-teeth. They are called nut-teeth because they were used by our ancestors to crack the shells of nuts. Following the invention of the nutcracker by Tchaikovsky in 1892 we no longer crack nuts with our teeth, rendering the nut-teeth more or less obsolete. But we still keep ‘em in our mouths for sentimental reasons.
Then we have our four fangs. They are, contrary to popular belief, not used to suck blood. They do not have holes in ‘em. In fact, they’re actually used to display status. It has long been said that the man with the longest fangs have the bluest blood. Vegans are particularly disturbed by human fangs. It does not correlate with their belief that humans are naturally suited for a herbivore lifestyle. Which is true.
Finally there’s the flat front teeth. They don’t have a scientific name (due to negligence) but it has become custom amongst the gentry to give these eight teeth Christian names. Mine are called Magnus, Bosse, Tove, Torbjörn, Arvid, Kajsa, Daniel and Madame Scarlett. Experienced dentists may ask their patients to supply a list of names beforehand, in an attempt of reducing the risk of embarrassing blunders.
Now, that’s teeth. If you have any questions you are welcomed to ruminate on these silently in your room with the lights turned off.